When It's Over,
It's time to move on
When Your Spouse Won’t Sign Divorce Papers
You’ve made the decision to end your marriage. You filed the papers. Now your spouse is refusing to sign anything, and you’re sitting there thinking you’re stuck. Fortunately, California divorce law doesn’t work that way.
California Doesn’t Require Both Spouses To Agree
This is one of the most important things to understand about divorce in our state. We have a no-fault system. You don’t need to prove your spouse cheated or abandoned you or did anything wrong. You don’t need their permission either. One spouse wants out? That’s enough. Now, does cooperation make things easier? Absolutely. Will your life be simpler if your spouse signs the papers and agrees to reasonable terms? Without question. But their refusal to participate won’t prevent the divorce from happening. The state built protections into the law specifically so one person can’t trap another in an unwanted marriage.
What Actually Happens After Filing
You file the divorce petition. You serve your spouse with the papers. That starts a 30-day clock running. During those 30 days, your spouse has the right to respond. They can agree to your terms. They can disagree and file their own response, or they can do nothing at all. Most people don’t realize that doing nothing is actually a choice with consequences. When your spouse ignores the paperwork, they’re not stopping the process. They’re just changing how it proceeds.
Getting A Default Judgment
Let’s say those 30 days pass, and your spouse hasn’t responded. You can request what’s called a default judgment. Basically, you’re asking the court to grant the divorce based on the terms you originally proposed. The process looks something like this:
- You file a Request to Enter Default
- The court reviews what you’re asking for
- A judge looks at whether your proposed terms are fair and legal
- The divorce gets granted according to your petition
Default judgments often favor the person who filed because the other spouse gave up their chance to negotiate. But don’t think you can ask for anything outrageous and get it. The judge still has to approve everything. They’re going to make sure property division makes sense, that support calculations follow California guidelines, and that any custody arrangements serve the children’s best interests.
When Your Spouse Responds But Won’t Cooperate
Sometimes you get a response. Your spouse files paperwork, but they won’t agree to anything reasonable. This is different from ignoring the divorce entirely. Now you’re in contested territory, and that means more court involvement. A San Francisco contested divorce lawyer can walk you through preparing for hearings, negotiating when possible, and presenting your case when negotiation fails. These cases take longer, and they cost more, but they still end in divorce.
The Six-Month Waiting Period Applies To Everyone
California has a mandatory waiting period. Six months from the date your spouse gets served until the divorce can be finalized. This applies whether your spouse cooperates or not, whether you have a default judgment or a settlement agreement. The total length of your case depends on other factors, too. Court schedules vary by county. Complex asset division takes time. If you’re fighting over custody or there’s a business to value or you suspect hidden assets, expect the process to stretch beyond that minimum six months.
Protect Yourself During This Time
When your spouse refuses to engage, you can’t just sit back and wait. Document everything. Every attempt to communicate, every unreturned phone call, and every ignored email.
Keep detailed records of your assets and debts. Bank statements. Investment accounts. Retirement funds. If you’re worried your spouse might hide money or make financial decisions that hurt your settlement position, tell your attorney immediately. Working with Attorney Bernie means we can take action quickly when we spot potential problems.
You’re Not Stuck
Your spouse’s refusal to sign papers feels like a roadblock, it’s really just a speed bump.
California’s system provides clear paths forward. Default judgment if they ignore everything. Contested proceedings if they respond, but they won’t be reasonable. Either way, you’re getting divorced. A San Francisco contested divorce lawyer can look at your specific situation and tell you which path makes the most sense. Contact our firm, and we’ll talk through your situation, explain your options, and help you move forward with your case.

